1) How many of your current class have you found posting on this forum?
2) Why do you not appear to have spent any time teaching them the basics of spelling and punctuation?
3) Was it an official homework task to undertake their creative writing project on the incoming transfers thread?
4) Is there a debating society at your school?
5) Does transfer activity across the summer window follow a) a normal distribution; b) a Poisson distribution or c) a reverse Poisson distribution?
6) Which of the above would cause the most pant-wetting amongst your pupils