Our tale starts with a man called Dave. Dave is the biggest fan of tractors you've ever met. Growing up on a farm he admired the tractors, and it never went away. Now at 35 Dave has Tractor wallpaper, miniature tractors, full size tractors, clothes with tractors on, toilet roll with tractors on, and even some tractor blue movies (oo-er). Since he was a young man his mother had been pestering him, "Dave you need to stop with these tractors, go out there and find a woman and produce me some grandchildren". Although Dave loved his tractors, he'd now got to 35 and had nothing to show for it. So he finally said "alright mum". Dave sold all of his tractor paraphernalia, and hit the gym. The girl at the grocery store always smiled at him and made a lot of small talk, so Dave thought why not and asked her out, thankfully she said yes. So, Dave takes the lady out for dinner. Now this was before the smoking ban so there were a lot of people in the restaurant smoking. After they sat down for their starter a large group of men chuffing cigars sat down on the table next to them. The lady was clearly distressed by this as she was coughing and spluttering and there was so much smoke that the restaurant became hazy and you couldn't see much further than 3 metres. Seeing the lady in distress Dave said "Don't worry, I'll sort this". Dave leaned back and did a huge, long, deep inhale that lasted for about 30 seconds, all of the smoke in the room went into his lungs and the room was clear. He then stepped outside and breathed it all out, when he returned to the table the girl, astonished, asked "That was amazing how did you do that?", Dave replied:
"I'm an extractor fan"