A hundred and one things that aren't ideal

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Paul Cannell

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BorntobePep started this one off so many of have now realised that a 0-7 home defeat is 'not ideal'. I wonder if we can find another hundred?

If I may begin: 2. the surgeon amputates the wrong leg.
 
3. Your boss catches you in bed with his wife and daughter.
 
4. Uncle firoz signs off on a 25 year lease masterminded by the legendary nick merry
 
5. You're having dinner at Le Manoir and click your fingers irritatingly to attract the waiter's attention He disappears briefly and returns with a pair of castanets.
6. Whist sitting in the waiting area at a GUM clinic, the tannoy announces your consultant is ready to see you, stating your name twice
 
Assuming that 'Dwight Tiendalli' is dutch for 'extremely good player'
Thinking that 'Pep Clotet' is spanish for 'manager'
Thinking that 'Firoz Kassam' is tanzanian for 'benefactor'
 
7. Becoming a football agent, but only having s**t players and a useless manager on ur books
 
8.Posting up nonsense on a football forum for supporters of a club you have no (business) interest in, and even less of an affity with that football club and its supporters

9.Creating imaginary work experience employees to blame for erroneous public statements on social media ( my youngest grandson is social media savvy, hes 4 years old! so how a teenager wasnt aux fait with Twitter baffles belief!)
 
11. Doing work experience for a dodgy one man band football Agent.
14. That Titanic was described as unsinkable.
 
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13. Shushing home fans before letting the bottom team in the league who were dead and buried score 2 goals in 5 minutes to let them do the double over us.
 
14. Describing your jewellery business’s products as “total crap” and that they are “cheaper than an M&S prawn sandwich but probably wouldn't last as long.” At the Royal Albert Hall.
 
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